3 Simple Guidelines for Having Better Conversations

3 Simple Guidelines for Having Better Conversations Written by Carlita Southworth Sitting around the table at a family gathering, the conversation has veered political once again. It’s mostly one person talking, sharing his thoughts on a current controversy, on how churches have handled it, are handling it, and ought to be handling it. Some of us agree, some don’t. A phone is passed around, and when I see a post of someone who is sharing her views in a way that seems ridiculous to us, I laugh. Then, I’m stricken.  What good does it do to laugh at this woman? She’s a person, worthy of respect just as I am. Have I started to “sit in the company of mockers” as I’m warned not to in Psalm 1? The conversation continues, but when I go to bed, I wonder if I gained any benefit or benefited anyone else through this conversation. Reading 1 Timothy 1:3-7 the next morning, I couldn’t help but reflect on our chat more. Paul instructs Timothy to encourage people not to spend their time arguing about genealogies, a popular religious debate of the day. I wonder how much this advice might apply to me and my conversations—political, theological, or general conversations about life and the world that do the same thing Paul is warning against: “…Such things promote controversial speculations rather than advancing God’s work—which is by faith. The goal of this command is love, which comes from a pure heart, a good conscience, and a sincere faith. Some have departed from these and have turned to meaningless talk. They want to be teachers of the law, but they do not know what they are talking about or what they so confidently affirm” (1 Timothy 1:4b-7). Thinking about the passage, I saw that Paul makes it pretty easy to see when we’re straying into the realm of meaningless talk. Thankfully, Paul also gives some thoughts on what the focus of our conversation should be instead.